What Are the Components Of Effective Networking?
Effective networking is an essential part of professional life.
It's how our resumé makes it to the top of the pile.
It’s how people create bespoke opportunities specifically for us.
It’s how we're introduced to ideas and options we’d never think of on our own.
But not all professional networking conversations are equal.
When you understand the three components of effective networking, you'll be able to create mutually-beneficial relationships that help you make your next career move—and thrive once you get there.
Why Is Effective Networking Important?
What do I mean when I say “effective networking”? I mean creating real connections, which lead to real relationships, which lead to real opportunities.
You already know that successful relationships are at the heart of everything we do—and the key to our success.
You know this.
And yet, something weird happens when we hear the word “networking.” We get all stiff and formal and lose all capacity to be our normal, vibrant, powerful selves and have the conversation we WANT to have.
There are many approaches you can take to networking. I’m all about finding a way into these conversations that works for you.
That said, understanding the three elements of effective networking—and how they work together—will transform your relationships. You’ll have more fruitful and effective conversations that you actually enjoy (gasp!)
3 Components of Effective Networking
Here's the basic formula we'll use to make your networking effective and enjoyable:
You + The Right Person + Your Ask = Effective Networking
Component 1: You
This may sound obvious, but remembering to be yourself is often one of the hardest parts of effective networking.
Do you feel like you need to be super formal or have a polished script or elevator pitch?
All these things make us feel like we have to be someone we’re not, which makes the conversations awkward and stilted, which makes us avoid them.
So what’s the easiest way to be you? Ask yourself how you’d like the conversation to feel.
Do you want to skip the small talk and get down to brass tacks? Maybe you want to feel like you’re having drinks with the girls?
Like everything in life, effective networking is about leadership.
And I don’t mean leadership in some prescriptive, hierarchical, domineering way.
I’m talking about the energy you lead with, how you show up: Bringing who you are at your best to these conversations. So if you’re quirky and funny and bubbly, that’s what you get to bring.
Because you want to attract the people that get you. And repel the people who don’t.
Hiding behind a formal veneer or morphing into a different persona is exhausting. And it’s going to attract people who won’t be a good fit anyway.
Effective networking is about building meaningful, authentic relationships. The best way to do that is by being who you are.
Component 2: The Right Person
Effective networking involves interacting with another person. That’s right, you’re talking to a real, live human who has feelings, thoughts, and aspirations, just like you.
Sometimes we mistakenly think of our potential networking connections only in terms of what they can do for us. I call this “transacting," and it’s not an approach for building effective relationships.
Be strategic about who you talk to, sure, but remember they’re a person with resources, connections, interests, and skills beyond what you see on LinkedIn. They're so much more than their job title or where they work.
If you’re not interested in knowing them, you may miss out on ways they can help that you don’t know about.
I invite you to practice curiosity here. What interests you about them as a person? What motivates them? What lights them up?
Get curious about those questions. The introductions, the opportunities, and everything else will flow from that.
If you can’t find something that intrigues you about them, that’s a sign that they may not be the right person.
Remember, the goal of effective networking is to build long-term, mutually-beneficial relationships with people you like and respect. Otherwise, it’s a drain on everyone’s time and energy that brings you no closer to what you actually want.
Component 3: The Ask
The third component of effective networking is The Ask.
The Ask doesn’t necessarily mean literally asking for something.
Your ask is the reason you’re talking to someone. So if you don’t know what it is, they won’t either.
Think about a time where someone invited you to a conversation and you spent the whole time wondering what they really wanted.
It puts people on edge and wastes everyone’s time.
Being up front about what you want or need, and what support you’d like from them, is one of the most generous things you can do. It will relax your networking partner into the conversation and help them know where to focus.
Your ask can really be anything.
It could be wanting to know how they got where they are. It could be you’re really interested in finding the right culture, so you want to hear about their experience at a company you admire.
It could simply be sharing, “I’m at a career crossroads, and would like to get your take on a couple of options I’m considering.”
Remember, in the same way you want to get to know them, think about what you want them to know about you. Don’t let awkwardness or discomfort keep you from being transparent about what you truly want and where you are in the process.
Don’t bury the lede. People want to help. How can they do that if they don’t know what you want?!
How the 3 Components Work Together
These three components go far beyond effective networking. You’ll find they help you show up more confidently and powerfully in allll your relationships. Why?
These components work together to facilitate genuine and open conversations:
If you can’t be yourself in a conversation, it's not going to feel authentic.
If you're talking to the wrong person, the best you can hope for is short-term benefits, if any.
If you don’t know your goal with the conversation, even a great conversation won’t lead to the right opportunities.
Which of the 3 components of effective networking do you plan to focus on first? Scroll down to comment and share.
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Author Bio:
Before becoming a coach, Caroline worked in management consulting and financial services. She's made it her mission to help people grow, contribute, and get wherever they want to go.
She’s also a tennis fanatic, aspiring Minimalist, FIRE (Financial Independence and Retire Early) enthusiast, and Aloha Spirit seeker 🤙. She loves to share stories from her unconventional life and career focused on freedom, creativity, fun, health, family, and community. If she can do it, you can, too.
The life and career you want really is possible once you have the roadmap. Take the first step by downloading her free 4-step career roadmap.
